Transgressive Sex And Shame And The Narcissist | Narcissistic Abuse Erectile Dysfunction

When we think about abusive relationships, we often think of physical violence. But there is another type of abuse that’s just as damaging and can be just as difficult to escape: sexual abuse. Sexual abuse can take many forms, from outright rape to coerced incestuous relationships. And when it’s perpetrated by a narcissist, the consequences can be devastating. In this post, we will explore the realities of sexual abuse and how it can lead to transgressive sex and shame. We’ll also discuss what you can do if you find yourself in a relationship with a narcissist and struggling with erectile dysfunction.

What is Transgressive Sex?

There is no one answer to what qualifies as transgressive sex, as the definition will vary depending on who you ask. Generally speaking, transgressive sex is any sexual activity that takes place outside of the traditional boundaries of vanilla sexuality. This could include anything from anal sex to BDSM play to threesomes.

Transgressive sex can often be fraught with shame and embarrassment for the person involved. For a narcissist, who thrives off of feeling powerful and in control, transgressive sex is a major threat to their ego. They may react in a variety of ways, from trying to dominate or control the encounter completely to emotionally blackmailing the other person into continuing the relationship.

If you are experiencing transgressive sex with a narcissist, it is important to remember that you are not alone. There is often a lot of secrecy and shame surrounding this type of behavior, which makes it difficult for people to talk about it openly. It can be helpful to seek support from friends or family members who can lend an ear and offer reassurance.

What are the Signs of Transgressive Sex?

Several red flags may indicate that someone is being sexually aggressive or transgressive. They may: 
-Talk about sexual conquests or try to make you feel like you’re not good enough without sex
-Make you feel like you owe them for sex, or like you need to do something special for them to get it
-Force sex when you don’t want it, or do things sexually that make you uncomfortable
-Make comments about your body or make threats about taking away your freedom if you don’t have sex with them
-Treat sex as a way to control and dominate you

If any of these behaviors are happening to you, it’s important to reach out for help. There are several resources available, such as support groups and counseling. It can be difficult to deal with these types of issues on our own, but understanding what’s going on can help us take the necessary steps to get out from under their control.

The Effects of Transgressive Sex

There is a lot of information out there on the effects of transgressive sex, but much of it is contradictory. So what are the main effects? The most commonly cited effects are:

1. Transgressive sex can cause erectile dysfunction. This is due to physical and emotional trauma to the penis.

2. Transgressive sex can cause psychological damage, including PTSD and depression.

3. Transgressive sex can lead to relationship problems, as it can be a way for partners to prove their dominance over each other.

4. Transgressive sex can lead to feelings of shame and guilt. Victims may feel like they are responsible for the abuse, or that they have somehow caused it themselves.

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How to Deal with Transgressive Sex

If someone you know is exhibiting sexually aggressive behavior, there are a few things you can do to deal with the situation.

First, it’s important to understand that this type of behavior is not always easy to deal with, but it’s important to take action to protect yourself and/or your loved ones. In some cases, the person who is engaging in sexually aggressive behavior may be suffering from a mental health condition such as narcissistic disorder or borderline personality disorder. In these cases, it can be difficult for them to recognize or understand how their behavior is impacting others.

If you’re concerned that someone you know may be exhibiting sexually aggressive behavior, it’s important to talk to them about what’s going on. This can help them understand why their actions are causing problems and potentially lead to a change in their behavior. If this doesn’t work, consider speaking with a therapist or counselor who can help identify the root of the problem and provide support during the healing process.

How to Prevent Transgressive Sex From Happening

There is a lot of talk about triggering people into transgressive sex, but oftentimes it’s the victim who is blamed for not being able to take a punch. In reality, there are ways that you can help avoid transgressive sex from happening in the first place.

First and foremost, know your boundaries. If you don’t want to be touched in certain places or do not feel comfortable with physical contact, make sure that you let your partner know early on. And if something does happen that makes you uncomfortable, don’t stay quiet about it- tell them right away what’s going on and ask for help getting out of the situation.

Furthermore, be aware of your partner’s behavior. If they seem to be deliberately trying to push your boundaries or cause emotional distress, it may be time to end things between you two. No one deserves to be treated this way- not even someone who has behaved poorly in the past.

Lastly, never keep anything hidden from your partner- whether it’s an issue with their behavior or any personal problems that you’re dealing with on your own. This only leads to secrecy and mistrust, which will only make things worse down the line. Talk openly and honestly with each other about everything- including sex!

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Do narcissists have problems with erectile dysfunction?

Erectile dysfunction (ED) is a common problem among men. It’s estimated that about 30% of men will experience some form of ED at some point in their lives. However, narcissism may be a factor in increased rates of ED among certain groups of people.

Narcissists often have a very fragile self-image. As a result, they may be particularly sensitive to any criticism or doubt about their ability to perform sexually. This can lead to problems with erectile function, as narcissists often place a high value on their masculinity and sexual prowess.

Furthermore, narcissists often view relationships as competition. If they lose the erection competition with their partner, they may feel humiliated and angry. This can lead to problems with erectile function, as narcissists are sometimes reluctant to discuss problems or seek assistance.

If you’re experiencing difficulty with erectile function, it may be helpful to talk to your doctor about your symptoms. Alternatively, you could consider consulting a sex therapist who can provide advice on how to improve your sexual performance.

How does a narcissist deal with erectile dysfunction?

Most narcissists do not suffer from erectile dysfunction (ED), but for those who do, dealing with it can be a very difficult process. Narcissists typically believe that they are superior to all other people, including when it comes to their sex life. This can lead them to feel entitled to sexual gratification no matter what. As a result, they may become irritated or angry when their erectile dysfunction becomes an issue.

In some cases, the narcissist may try to mask or deny the problem. They may insist that everything is fine or that they don’t need help. However, in most cases, the narcissist will eventually seek out professional help. This is because they understand that ED is a problem and that it can impact their social status and overall self-image.

By addressing the underlying issues – such as entitlement and inflated self-esteem – narcissists can often overcome problems with erectile dysfunction.

What narcissistic abuse does to a man?

Narcissistic abuse can do a lot of damage to a man’s body and mind. It can lead to erectile dysfunction, depression, anxiety, and a host of other problems.

One of the most devastating effects of narcissistic abuse is the way it diminishes a man’s self-confidence. He starts to doubt himself and his abilities, which makes it difficult for him to get aroused or maintain an erection.

In addition, narcissistic abusers often label their victims as “sluts” or “whores.” This labels them as unattractive and unworthy of love, which further undermines their confidence and ability to trust themselves.

Narcissistic abusers also make their victims feel ashamed of their bodies. They may tell them that they’re overweight or too thin, or that they have ugly genitals. This humiliation further depresses the victim and reduces his self-esteem.

Finally, narcissistic abusers frequently use threats or violence to control their victims. If the victim tries to leave or confront the abuser, he might be threatened with violence or even physical harm. These intimidation tactics render the victim almost helpless in face of narcissistic abuse.

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What is cognitive dissonance in a narcissistic relationship?

Cognitive dissonance is a psychological term used to describe the experience of holding two conflicting beliefs simultaneously. In a narcissistic relationship, one of the most common examples of cognitive dissonance is when the narcissist insists on always being right and having all the power in a relationship, while also exhibiting signs or symptoms of being abusive or controlling. This creates uncomfortable tension for the victim, who may find it difficult to justify their feelings of emotional and physical insecurity towards someone who seems intelligent and in control. 

To cope with this tension, many victims develop defensive mechanisms, such as self-blame or justification, that help them reconcile the conflicting information. These mechanisms create an emotional state known as cognitive dissonance which can be incredibly damaging to both the victim and the narcissist. Cognitive dissonance can lead to feelings of anxiety, stress, guilt, shame, and depression, among other negative emotions. It can also contribute to physical health problems such as erectile dysfunction or chronic pain. 

Although cognitive dissonance is often an inevitable part of a narcissistic relationship, it can be avoided by identifying and avoiding situations that create tension. Victims can also learn how to tolerate cognitive dissonance by using self-compassion tools like meditation or mindfulness. By understanding and navigating through cognitive dissonance in a narcissistic relationship, both parties can benefit from increased clarity and stability in their relationships


There are a lot of talks these days about transgressive sex and shame. The concept of transgressive sex is pretty self-explanatory — it refers to sexual activities that go beyond the boundaries of what would be considered “normal” or “healthy.” Shame, on the other hand, can be a difficult thing to define. It’s a complex emotion that can range from feeling embarrassed or guilty to feeling like you have lost all control over your life. But if you’re living in an abusive relationship, shame may well be one of your primary emotions. For someone who is experiencing transgressive sex or shame in their relationship, it can feel incredibly scary and confusing. Oftentimes, perpetrators will use these emotions as tools to control their victims. They will label any behavior that doesn’t conform to their idea of what is “acceptable” as shameful and wrong, which can make it extremely difficult for the victim to stand up for themselves. If you are experiencing transgressive sex or shame in your relationship, don’t hesitate to reach out for help. There are plenty of resources available online and through local helplines that specialize in helping survivors of abuse deal with trauma such as sexual assault.

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